Chances are that you are more critical of your own appearance than others. I have been paying attention to this in my own life lately. Obviously, my hair loss makes me somewhat more self-conscious over my appearance than I otherwise would be (or I probably would never have started this site). But I don’t think most people really notice. Mind you, I’m a norwood 3V, so from the front, my hair line is still intact (if a little too high up in my opinion); however, to most people this seems to appear normal, and I don’t think people really look at me thinking, “man that guy has a high forehead” unless they are very juvenile, in which case it doesn’t phase me anymore.
I still have to make a conscious effort not to let my hair loss bother me and this is a daily battle. However, I think I’m winning it and have been for a long time now. Age may have something to do with it. I felt infinitely more crappy when I was in my early 20’s losing my hair than I do in my early 30’s, but it’s more than just age. It’s perspective.
I guess what I am trying to say is that if you’re letting your hair loss effect your life to the point that it controls how you interact with people, you can and should realize that most people don’t care about it as much as you do, and certainly don’t count it as the most important thing when it comes to your overall appearance or their impression of you.
A healthy looking, confident bald guy that takes care to look as good as possible is more attractive (or so I’ve been told by numerous women) than a guy with a full head of hair but no self-esteem. That’s a fact (unless of course the woman doing the judging has low self-esteem herself).
I can only talk from my own life experience and from the perspective of a guy. My apologies to the women that read my posts and get a male centric view all the time. Perhaps if a woman is reading this post you can fill me in on what it’s like from your perspective to be losing your hair, and to what degree what I am saying in this post resonates with you.
On a completely separate and unrelated note. Here’s a picture of my dog, to brighten your day a little:
First off, great post. You have made some excellent points and making that conscious effort to not let hair loss effect you is very, very, very, important for the hair loss sufferor. Secondly, that dog is cute as hell. Is it full grown. I may just post a pic of my dog!
Hey James,
I really think that the trick is to try to get the best look you can from what you have. For me, keeping it short seems to do the trick (the pictures I posted a few days ago are actually of my hair when it’s at it’s longest). If after that, one is STILL bothered by the hair loss, then there are options like concealers and even transplants or for some peole (not for me) hair systems.
So we just have to keep things in perspective to the best of our abilities.
As for the dog, at first when we were looking for a dog I wanted a golden lab, but we live in an apartment in downtown Vancouver, so space was an issue. When we saw this little gal my wife instantly fell in love with her (and I must admit that I took quite a liking to her as well). I didn’t want a small dog but you know what, she’s so smart and laid back and loyal that I think I’m absolutely enamoured by her.
By all means post a picture of your dog!
You’re right, its really about perspective. Age is a big factor too, 20 year-old is like a man’s golden year. You feel you want to get all the girls, and believe me, at that age girl go for the looks more.